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Top Tips for arranging a funeral
When natural burial is something a family or a dying person has already decided on, we are often the first organisation someone calls when death occurs. Very often the person or their family have contacted us for information prior to the death. We welcome this as we are able to offer advice and options that make the planning process much easier when it is needed.
Contacting us allows us to share our experience of what works well and makes a funeral more fulfilling and more styled to the person, their family and friends. We have gained this knowledge from the feedback our own customers give us about the positive and healing effects of a funeral at a natural burial ground. It also comes from years of listening to people’s stories about funerals they have been to in the past that were dissatisfying.
These are some of the things that come up.
There’s no hurry - Slow things down and allow yourself to come to terms with what has happened before you make any decisions about the funeral.
Keep control – When someone dies in hospital or in a nursing home you might be asked quite quickly who your funeral director is so that the body can be removed. It is ok to tell them that you are not ready yet and will let them know when you are. If pressured by the hospital staff who might have space difficulties, a funeral director will collect and store the person but you are under no obligation to use this company for the funeral itself. The funeral director you choose for the funeral will arrange to collect the person from the temporary funeral director.
Delegate – You have got a lot to organize under tough emotional circumstances. Give people permission to help. People want to help but may not know how so be specific. It’s a good idea to write a list and keep it by the phone.
walk the dog
sandwiches for the wake
list cards and flowers received
Shop around – Find a funeral director who is familiar with natural burial and in tune with your ideas. Independent funeral directors usually have a wider range of eco coffins and are more flexible than the big chains.
Don't be afraid to say no - Tell your funeral director if there are things on his checklist that you don't want or need. It can help to take a close friend or relative that can take over a discussion if you become too upset. You can still be there indicating preferences and your wishes.
Dare to be different – Anything goes at a natural burial ground. There are no pre-conceptions and you can be as formal or informal as you like.
Make it personal – take the dog, a favorite object, flower, photograph or memento from a hobby or sport.
Children - Include children if you want to. Natural burial grounds are not like cemeteries and it doesn’t matter if children want to run around, be themselves and even play.
Be yourselves – Try not to be persuaded by others that you must do things a certain way.
Plan ahead if at all possible - A good reason to contact us before someone dies is that there can be no doubt that their wishes are being followed. Sometimes, especially after a sudden death, wanting to do what the person would have wished, or trying to find out if they had discussed it with other family members or friends, can add significantly to the emotional burden already being felt.
Of course, not all funerals can be planned in advance but where ever its possible we do advise it.